Ten things I would do if I were visiting Fort Worth for the Main Streets Arts Festival and I didn't live here already.

Bar at Capital Grille, Fort Worth

Okay, that's a long title, but you get the idea.

You may have other suggestions, as a matter of fact, I'm sure if you live in Fort Worth you'll have a different list, but if I was in town for just a couple days (and I didn't live here already) here's what I'd try to fit in.

1. Attend something at Bass Hall.
2. Go to the Kimbell to see Michelangelo and Bernini. Or the Modern. Both are considered, as is Bass Hall, some of the nation's finest.
3. Eat lunch and browse at Central Market. Great place to stock up for the weekend. Good selection of beer, wine, breads, cheese, etc.
4. Visit 7th Street for a walk, a drink, or dinner. I think everyone who has lived here for a while is surprised to see how 7th Street from Summit to University has exploded with restaurants, shops, apartments, bars, and shopping.  It's worth visiting.
5. Rent a bike at Trinity Bicycles and ride along the river from University Park to around the old Cats baseball park and back. Once you get on the north side of Fort Worth it's a quiet, country ride.
6. A healthy walk at the Botanical Gardens. The roses are blooming this time of year and the gardens are spring-green from the rain and warm weather.
7. Walk Magnolia Street and pick a place for a meal or a drink. Magnolia Street has a more organic, less planned feel to it than 7th, and it is still developing with small family or privately owned businesses. It's still my favorite street in Fort Worth.  Ryan's Grocers, Lili's Bistro, Ellerbe Fine Foods, Nonna Tata, Benito's. All good.
8. Grab a beer at the White Elephant on Saturday night and walk around the Stockyards. The White Elephant is a bar that doesn't pretend to be anything else. They serve beer and drinks and have live music and a small dance floor. Or it did. I haven't been in a few years. Esquire magazine places it in the top 100 bars in America which may mean it's now popular and not as good. 
9. And last but not least downtown Fort Worth where Main Streets Arts Festival is held. Want a great steak? I like Capital Grille. 
10. Enjoy the Main Street Arts Festival. One of this city's best annual events. 

Opening Day

For those of us who grew up when baseball was America's game there is no day like Opening Day, and indeed, I  suggest that no other activity in American life introduces itself with as much joyous fanfare. What other sport has our President introduce its season with something akin to a first pitch? There is no presidential first pass in football, no first jump shot in basketball, or shot on goal in hockey or soccer. Only baseball has that honor.

And why shouldn't it?  Opening Day kind of personifies the American love of re-birth, of forgetting what is behind and moving forward, of hoping once again that this year is our year. Baseball opens with spring's first days; the sun is shining, the grass is growing, the birds are singing. Life is good.

Think I've gone too far? Well let me add this: I think it no coincidence that Easter and opening day are near the same day of the year. I mean no disrespect when I say that baseball's opening day has some metaphorical relation to the Resurrection of our Lord. The winter that is football is over. The sun shines anew.

I have been fortunate enough to attend dozens of opening days at the ballparks in Arlington and always love that first sense of the place: the green grass, the smiling, hopeful faces, the smell of hotdogs, beer, and nachos, the pretty girls parading about, and the sound of the first crack of ball meeting bat. God is good.

It's morning in America.

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The Texas Rangers played their first game at home of the season this afternoon. Opening Day score: 3 - 2. Rangers win.
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The un-erectable Erector Set.

A few days ago, Marian brought home an erector set for my grandson who is seven years old. The nicely packaged and handsome set of plastic screws, nuts, wheels and one electric motor makes, or should make, five different kinds of trucks. Just follow instructions, pictures provided.

As you might expect. No way.

Let me say before I make myself look foolish that I have re-engineered and assembled at home for my self, my wife, and my children everything from gas cooking grills, to swing sets, doll houses, bicycles and even Ikea furniture (the only item in the list that is easy). You name it I've assembled it, albeit never without calling the manufacturer every possible curse word related to God, the after-life, mothers and dogs. But I usually prevailed through disregarding the non-instructive instructions.

So when my grandson asked me if I wanted to help I said sure, thinking that a toy sold for ages 5 - 8 as self assembly would be nothing but me holding something while the grandson built.

An hour into what was supposed to be a self-propelled dump truck I gave up. I didn't tell him that I had given up because what we had self propelled, and that's really all he cared about --if you held on to the loose pieces rattling off the dump truck part.

One question for the erector set manufacturer. Could I meet the five year old you tested this on?
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O Great Mystery

Happy Easter one and all!

More words and phrases men shouldn't use

A couple of years ago,  on these hallowed pages, I requested the American male population to refrain from using the word "Yum" or "Yummie." That request has been widely heralded and accepted amongst men across social and political lines.

Since then several more words have come to my attention.

Men should not use the following words:

• Adorable -- this one is borderline and in some cases could be acceptable. I said could. Around your wife or girl friend, maybe.
• Veggy -- first of all, it's a vegetable and that's not that difficult to say, and second, you don't need to be talking about something that doesn't matter to you.
• Share -- as in your feelings. Feelings are meant to be suppressed. That's what manhood is. Deal with it. Sharing is okay when referring to money spent on your grandchildren.
• Baby Bump -- this is to me the fingernails on the chalkboard phrase of the year. If you are using it stop, somebody's slipping estrogen into your cocoa puffs.

Also, it has come to my attention that men are attending "Gender Reveal"* parties where the sex of the expected child is announced in a cute, sharing kind of way in the presence of other couples and friends. Is there no end to the emasculation of this generation of men? Please stop.

That's all for now. Thank you.

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* New York Times. Gender Reveal Party
* The Ticket Podcast on same