Monday, September 15, 2008

Reductio ad Absurdam?

It is not unusual in one's "old age" to attempt to reduce life to an essence, a compact kernel of truth, a glimpse through the darkened glass that is this world.

You'll hear these reductions in the form of advice from the elder to the younger, "Son, I'll tell you what's important: _________." And the sentence is completed with such ideals as, good family, close friends, enjoyable employment, financial security, or even the commonplace, like a good fishing hole, or a daily round of golf.

I have decided after my 56 years that I, like my father before me, and possibly my siblings as well, have reduced life to one ideal, and it is this:

Avoid Traffic.

That's right.
Like a plague of locusts. I will do anything to avoid it.

I am not saying it is the most noble of reductions to live by, but I am being honest, because I have noticed that I daily make decisions based on this necessity of avoidance and consider each new venture with it as my guiding light.

For instance, if I am asked, "Want to go to the Cowboy game? I say, "Nah, too much traffic." If I am at a Rangers baseball game, by the 7th inning, I'm considering my exit strategy in order to "to beat the traffic." And I would no more go to Texas Motor Speedway on race day than walk to El Paso in August. Watching cars go around in a circle after waiting in 5 hours of traffic to see said event is not my idea of fun.

Once when my children were young we decided to take our vacation in San Antonio and Sea World in particular. I thought the best time to go would be when the crowds were low and had made our travel plans accordingly. After a very nice stress-free vacation my wife had one comment. "I liked going when the crowds are low but I think a few more people in the park would have been nice."

We weren't alone at Sea World, but it was close. Another Griswoldian decision by yours truly, and such is the problem of life . . . (to be continued)


Anonymous said...

You too? That's why I work from home :)

Cowboy fan, burger junkie, GodFather of Tech said...

I *AM* not alone!

It's a necessity for me. I get road rage. Bad.

Francis Shivone said...


"Solamen miseris socios habuisse doloris"